Amish jokes, anecdotes, irony. Yes, they laugh.
English: 'How many horsepower in your buggy?' Amish: 'One. And she's smarter than your Tesla.'
Tourist: 'Do you have Wi-Fi?' Amish farmer: 'We have a wife. She knows everything about everyone. Fa...
'My GPS says turn right.' — 'My horse has known the way since 2008. No updates. No subscription. No ...
English woman in store: 'Is this organic?' Amish: 'Ma'am, it's corn. Grew in manure. Manure from hor...
'How do you wake up without an alarm?' — 'We have a rooster. He doesn't ask if I want more sleep. He...
Amish Tinder: Sunday singing. 30 people. Everyone knows each other. Swipe right = get in his buggy. ...
'Are you on Facebook?' — 'No. But I know all community news in 30 seconds. Miriam told Rachel, Rache...
Tourist: 'How do you live without electricity?!' Amish: 'How do you live with a $200/month electric ...
Cop pulled over a buggy. 'Do you know how fast you're going?' — '8 km/h, officer.' — 'That's... too ...
'Do you have a weather app?' — 'Yes. It's called a window. You open it and look.'
Amish Uber: shout 'Jacob!' over the fence. In 15 minutes — buggy. Cost: a pie. Rating: 5 stars (alwa...
English: 'I can simultaneously answer email, listen to a podcast, and eat a sandwich.' Amish: 'I can...
'Does your buggy need an update?' — 'No. 1875 model. Works perfectly. Your iPhone needs updating eve...
English: 'My data is in the cloud.' Amish: 'My data is in the barn. Barn can't be hacked. Only by li...
'What's your diet?' — 'Breakfast: eggs from our chickens. Lunch: meat from our cow. Dinner: vegetabl...
'Do you see a therapist?' — 'No. I see my cow. Tell her everything. She listens. Doesn't interrupt. ...
'What's your password?' — 'For what? Barn? No lock. House? No lock. Buggy? No lock. We live in a wor...
'How do you do meetings?' — 'Everyone comes. In person. Sits. Talks. Listens. Nobody's on mute. Nobo...
'When do you retire?' — 'Never. Move to Dawdy Haus and do the same, just slower. And grandchildren b...
Amish influencer: Grandma Miller. 82 years old. 47 grandchildren. All listen. All repeat her pie rec...